My best judgement signed its resignation.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2007-03-07T20:04:00

2007-03-08T01:21:46Z

There's more to life than snorting white powder up your nose and mixing pills with alcohol.

Your girlfriend will come home from a late night party at a trendy Manhattan night club, and find you in the bathtub of your apartment. This leads to a 911 call, and you'll obviously land in the hospital (may I add that you'll be handcuffed to the hospital bed, for you tried punching one of the EMT's). You will have to drink charcoal, and then the nurses will neglect you and forget that the purpose for consuming the charcoal is to flush out your system. You will vomit all over yourself, and begin shaking helplessly while you slowly fade into a comatose. Your life will flash before your eyes, and the next thing you know, you'll wake up in a white room, which happens to be the psychiatric division of the hospital.

I know what all that's like. It's a nightmare, and abusing illegal drugs to escape the realities of true life is pathetic.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-10-13T11:36:00

2006-10-13T15:38:23Z

So, I was supposed to go back to Buffalo this weekend to attend my little brother and sister's baptism, but my flight was cancelled, on a count of the crazy ass snow. Here in NYC it's nice out and it's just hard to believe that only a short distance away there's almost two feet of snow. Haha. That sucks though.

I'm really bored. I want some cereal, but there is none. I might go out for breakfast alone in a little while. Maybe I'll make my way into Manhattan.

I hope Shannon ends up coming back to the city. Her and Russell are stranded in Rochester.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-10-04T02:44:00

2006-10-04T06:45:32Z

I feel like you're so far out of my reach, pretty girl. You were mine once, now you're not. I hope you know how much I think about you. I've been staying up all hours of the night, replaying the memories in my head, and I'm trying to figure out why I was stupid enough to let you go. You have a part of me that I feel like I can't ever get back. I am an asshole. I didn't treat you the way you deserved to be treated. I was selfish, and it's upsetting that I'm finally coming to terms with my problems. It's too late now. Never will I be able to wake up in the comfort of your arms. And never again will I be able to feel you breathing on my neck, nor will I be able to see that pretty smile that always made me melt.

Sometimes I feel like I can still smell your scent. It's haunting me. It makes my stomach turn and my head spin.

I love you. With all of my heart.
I've never felt so empty, and so unhopeful in my entire life. I'm not living the life that I want. It wasn't supposed to be this way.

I am no longer invincible. I got what I deserved. Heartbreak.
And it's also pathetic that I'm discussing my problems on livejournal. I feel like if I explained my situation to anyone, they'd call me self-centered, and obsessed. Maybe I am obsessed. And crazy.

I wish the whole memory erasing thing from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind was real. I'd get that procedure done in a heartbeat.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-10-04T00:40:00

2006-10-04T04:40:17Z

"I never really had a problem because of leaving,
But everything reminds me of her this evening.

So if I seem a little out of it, sorry...
But why should I lie?
Everything reminds me of her.

The spin of the earth impaled a silhouette of the sun on the steeple
And I got to hear the same sermon all the time now from you people
Why are you staring into outer space, crying?
Just because you came across it, and lost it."

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-08-16T23:56:00

2006-08-17T03:57:22Z

Alot has happened, fortunately.
I'm dating Russell's 23-year-old sister. And I found a place to live in Brooklyn.

I leave on Tuesday. Wish me luck.

Love,
Mary

Shitt.

2006-06-13T11:55:03Z

Today is my last day of High School, forever. I'm celebrating this accomplishment by not attending. Instead, I'll clean up my room and get this dying tree out in my backyard.

If I get accepted into Hunter's Dorming, then I'll be leaving August 25th for the big apple. If I don't get the dorming, then I'll be leaving even earlier. I'm anxious, but very, very ready.

Goodness

2006-05-30T02:07:48Z

School sucks. I love females.

School

2006-04-29T03:41:05Z

High School is almost done. Approximately six more weeks. I can't wait until I finally move to NYC in August. That will be the absolute best day of my life. I'm sure settling in will be difficult, but it'll be worth the frustration.

Work is alright. Besides the fact that I'm growing sick and tired of the paper and plastic.

You know what's funny? I used to look like a boy.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-04-22T15:56:00

2006-04-22T19:59:35Z

NYC was alot of fun. I got my Immunization Form done yesterday, and I faxed it on over to Hunter.
I can't wait to live in Manhattan in August. It will be great fun.

I just queefed for Shannon.

Goodness.

2006-04-10T01:05:53Z

The past couple of weeks have been rather exciting. I like being a big sister.
My sister Jaime came home from Vegas with her new man for a couple of days. I love them both.
I love wine.
I love girls.
I love Tegan And Sara.
Shannon and I aren't dating but we're still tight. I like it.
On Thursday I'm leaving for NYC for a week. I can't wait.

Here's a picture of the twins (Hunter, and Brooke) and then my older sisters (Jaime and Kate)
Of course everyone looks normal but me and floppy Brooke. I look like I just blew fifteen lines of cocaine.

Oh.

2006-03-20T00:44:35Z

Hockey is officially over. Today was my last game. Ever.

I'm going to NYC April 13-19 to visit Russell. It's going to be exciting.

Less then three months of high school left. Yes.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-03-04T21:03:00

2006-03-05T02:13:28Z

I'm such a lesbian. I love everything about girls.

So I'm a big sister. My stepmom has the twins on Tuesday night. Their names are Hunter and Brooke. I think that the names are rather awkward.
I'm going to save these kids from misery. I'm going to show them that it's okay to be different, and it's okay to be black. Louise will not brainwash these kids.

I have to work for five and a half hours tomorrow. I'm not dreading it.

I love Shannon. I've never loved anyone as much as I love her. She's so beautiful.
I can't wait until graduation.

Goooodbye Buffalo.

2006-02-27T01:52:56Z

I got into Hunter College in NYC. I'm so out of here. I can't wait.
Hopefully I'll be accepted into residence halls for students. If not, then Russell and I will be getting an apartment.

Who's excited for June to come?
High School has become such a joke.

Shannon's pretty fucking hott as well.

I'm getting my braces off on Thursday.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-02-04T21:08:00

2006-02-05T02:14:00Z

Being a vegetarian makes me feel fresh.
Leisha Hailey is extremely attractive.

I'm such a lesbian.

Shannon's 18th birthday is on Thursday.
We're going to get tattoos next weekend. Hopefully.

I miss Russell.
I found my graphing calculator.
I still haven't heard from Hunter yet.

Also, I believe that I just wrote the most amazing paper of my life. It's for my Law and Government class.

Should gay marriage be legalized? What’s wrong with two people of the same sex being in love? Aren’t they human beings too? According to CNN.com, more than half of all people in the United States oppose gay marriage, even though three fourths are otherwise supportive of gay rights. This means that many of the same people who are in favor of gay rights oppose gays on this one issue. But why? According to the bible, gay relationships are immoral. So what? The bible has absolutely no standing in American law. Whatever happened to the separation between church and state?
It’s bad enough to have a mass population of homophobes among the United States, but now we have to worry about another close-minded conservative, George W. Bush. On February 25, 2004, he called for an amendment that would put a ban on same sex marriage. He strongly believes that marriage is strictly reserved for a man and a woman. Several democrats condemned George W. Bush’s discriminative comments, and are truly disgusted by his views. Winnie Stachelberg, the political director of the Human Rights Campaign stated, "We are very disappointed that the president is trying to further codify discrimination into law". The Human Rights Campaign is the nation’s largest gay rights group.
Several believe that same sex marriage issue should be put into the hands of the states. A number of states have already passed laws forbidding gays from marrying or barring the recognition of a same-sex marriage performed in another state. The federal government's 1996 Defense of Marriage Act affirms that states are not required to recognize a same-sex marriage performed in another state. Honestly though, what’s all the fuss about? Why are so many people opposed to same sex marriages? It has been proven that the true reason as to why so many people are opposed to same sex marriages is simply because they’re uncomfortable with the idea. Conservatives also worry that homosexuals will “recruit”. In other words, they believe that gay people recruit straight people to become gay. The miseducated need to pick their heads up and realize that we’re all human beings and it’s wrong for gay individuals to be punished for their sexuality. I think it’s absolutely ludicrous that gays are being mistreated simply because they prefer to be romantically involved with someone of the same sex. Being gay is not a choice. Whoever thinks that you can choose your sexual orientation is dead wrong. It’s amusing to see all the programs on television that advertise “straight camps”. Trying to turn a gay person straight is like trying to teach a dog physics. It’s NOT possible. The attempts made by psychologists, counselors and religious therapy and support groups to change sexual orientation have all failed, terribly.
It’s so frustrating when you’ve come to the realization that the country you live in is full of oppressive conservatives who don’t take the feelings of others into consideration. Whether a person is gay or straight shouldn’t affect their stance in society. It is absolutely no one’s business who somebody decides to fall in love with. Homosexuals are certainly entitled to the same rights’ to marriage as heterosexuals. Whoever decided that marriage was “traditional” and strictly for “a man and a woman” should be hit in the face. This isn’t the 1950s anymore. We’re well into the millennium and it’s time that homosexuals be given the same rights as heterosexuals. It’s time for the traditionalists to take a step back and realize that our country is diverse in more ways than one. Acceptance is the first step.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-01-28T04:00:00

2006-01-28T04:02:11Z

I'm sitting here with my lady. She's so hott.

In other news, I got accepted into Purchase and Buff State.
Hopefully Hunter will send me something soon.

Livejournal is really stupid.

I love my woman.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2006-01-18T03:34:00

2006-01-18T03:35:18Z

twat is frothing with a delicious tasting foam
twat is interesting because it's the only word know applying to a part of the sexual anatomy that doesn't have another meaning
twat is a relatively unoffensive word meaning fool
twat is cumming
twat is spamming me on the email addy i registered to totl
twat is troy's mother

Oh god I'm insecure

2006-01-14T01:43:25Z

OMG. Lately I've been so disgusted with my body. So I showered and I had a camera. And I was like "oh boy wouldn't it be cool to have pictures of me on here?" So listen guys, I almost didn't do this, but I finally worked up the courage to post these recent pictures. I think I look okay. But maybe I need to lose a little weight.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2005-12-25T17:51:00

2005-12-25T22:54:23Z

Chardonnay and Strap-Ons.

What more could a lesbian ask for?!

Ah.

2005-12-07T02:31:25Z

The wake was so sad. I hugged Katie's mom. I was hysterical last night after I got home. When I keep myself busy it's hard to remind myself that someone I know has passed away. But when I sit around, I think way too much, and it gets me really upset. Katie was way too young. It just feels like it shouldn't have been her time.

After the wake Lauren Tober, Mister Stu, Lisa Crapsi, Rissa and I went to Flappy's and ate. I think that cheered all of us up a little bit.
Thanks again Rissa for arranging all that out so I could go to the wake.

Katie donated some of her organs. It's nice that she'll be saving others' lives.
I hope she's in a better place.

Sigh.

Baldajklda

2005-12-03T06:38:50Z

It's really weird when someone you know just dies. It scares the shit out of me.

I knew Katie through Rissa and what not. I guess she was in this horrible car accident, and her injuries were life threatening. Shit sucks.

Rest In Peace Katie Magle.

San Juan

2005-11-29T02:31:19Z

I'm still really happy about my report card. And I'm also happy because I got my college applications sent in this afternoon. And no assholes came into my line today at Wegmans. All of the customers were rather nice.

It's annoying though when people act like it's your fault that their food stamp balance is lower than they expected.
I've been slacking. I'm doing like fifteen loads of laundry. I need clean clothes, immediately.

I love spending my free time with Shannon. She's my woman. I sat at her house yesterday while she was working. Her mom sang En Vogue, and Missy was cracking me up with her clairnet.
I decided that my dream "job" is to be a gay rights' activist. I want to do public speaking.

Mary is bored.

Suzi Pullen is tall.

plkjiouqrasd @ 2005-11-27T13:13:00

2005-11-27T18:16:34Z

I just thought I should let everyone know that I actually made the honor roll.

My average was a 92.85...or 92. something.
Right when I'm ready to leave high school, I do well.
I guess this shows how anxious I am to leave.

Oh well. OHOOIohiialnkvakln

plkjiouqrasd @ 2005-11-23T21:44:00

2005-11-24T02:55:11Z

My stomach still turns each time I think about it.
I regret so much.

Works pretty good. I love everyone I work with, except this older lady named Tammy. She's like the deparment coordinator or something. Everybody hates her. I should get a pretty big paycheck on Friday.

I have to turn in my college applications soon. I should just become a stripper, or a prostitute. That's easy money. It's not like I'd have to go to college to choose one of those professions.

I'm really stupid, and I'm giving up on everything. I'm so angry that I couldn't even get 1000 out of 1600 on my SATs. That bullshit SAT class was such a waste of my time. I believe that some people aren't made to do well on the SATs. It's not like they really prove anything. At least that's what I think.

I hate high school. I hate all the fake people in it. I hate all the whores that throw themselves at the scummy males. I mean, whatever happened to self-respect? I fucking hate guys that think they're the pants because they stick their dicks into a slut's vagina. I'm going to be the one laughing when someone gets an STD. An STD in which that person will be stuck with boils and blisters on their crotch forever. Oh wait, that's already happened.
I hate the asshole teachers that decide to take a weeks vacation and leave us students in the class to rot.
I'm at the point where I don't care about anything. I need space. I need some time to collect my thoughts. Where am I going with my life? What do I want to do?

I don't know.
I think Shannon and I should just run away together.
Our one year anniversary is December 3rd.
We rock.

I hate dialup

2005-11-13T02:55:05Z

Nothing seems to go my way, ever. I'm not one to complain, but life is really terrible right now. Wednesday night was probably one of the worst nights I've had in a while. I was very close to running a knife through my chest. I can be really stupid sometimes. Although I have no control over my feelings, I really wish they weren't so screwy.

I'm still crying. I'm lonely. I don't know what I want anymore.
I just need to curl up with Shannon and have her tell me everything is going to be okay.

To top it off, my new Ipod Nano isn't working.

fdahjk

2005-11-07T02:55:14Z

I love Shannon so much. I really do.

This weekend wasn't too bad. Shannon slept over on Friday night and we went to our SATs on Saturday morning at Nardin. My father bought us coffee and hot apple cider from Tim Hortons. He also bought us two donuts that I really didn't want to eat. I gave them to Risa. I really hope I got at least 1000 out of 1600 on the SATs. If I don't, I think I'll die.

Tom Mathias is my hero.

I only have to go to school for two days this week. My father and I are going to visit colleges downstate. He's picking me up early on Thursday morning and we're driving to Old Westbury down on Long Island. Then we're visiting SUNY Purchase, and New Paltz. I really hope Purchase is a nice school, it's my first choice at the moment. It's only like 30 miles north of NYC. My father refuses to let me go to Hunter College in Manhattan.

If Morgan gets most changed since Freshman year I think I'll die. She lost weight, and yes, congratulations to her. But she didn't have a mohawk, look like a boy, and dress like a homeless person.

I'm really looking forward to college. High school makes me bitter. I hate dealing with stupid people. I hate the drama that I have to hear about. Yes, everyone talks shit.

I don't mind the senior class at all. I can't stand the rest of the classes.

I think it's time to move on.
I'd kill myself if I was a freshman in high school.
Buffalo sucks.